Taking Inventory

Now that I’ve outgrown

the hand-me-down furniture stage

and

I’ve survived

the crayon-marks-on-the-wall stage

and

I’ve eliminated every

potty seat,

booster seat and

car seat from my inventory

and

I’ve witnessed the last case

of Perego and Umbroller stroller

gridlock in my foyer

and

I’ve finally started living

in my living room,

it occurs to me

that adolescence

is a high price to pay

for surviving

childhood.